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Nigerian Spammers Display Exceptionally Poor English Skills

March 28th, 2010

spam-cream-soup.jpgApparently the Nigerian spammers who have been submitting bogus loan advertisements and fake anti-fraud notices in the comment section of this site are not taking much time to read through the English Usage section. One of their latest emails that I received earlier this month reveals that the English skills of Nigerian spammers have fallen to new lows with the first three sentences of their message all containing noticeable errors. It is becoming increasingly difficult to sympathize with victims of these types of scams because it would require a seriously malfunctioning brain to believe that such a message actually originated from a legitimate “anti-fraud unit.” Nevertheless, if you are looking for a good laugh while practicing your proofreading skills, see how many English usage errors you can find in the text below.


ICPC NIGERIA
Independent Corrupt Practices and Other
Related Offences Commission
United Nations Approved Anti-fraud Unit
Code of Conduct Bureau against fraud, funds delay and impersonation.

Head Office: Plot 802, Constitution Avenue
Zone A9 Central Area
P. M.B 535, Garki Abuja

Our Ref: ICPC/NG/FG/09
Date: 10th/March/2010

ATTN: Dear. Beneficiary,

APPROVED SETTLEMENT NOTICE.

This letter will definately be amazing to you because of it’s realistic value.

Sorry for the inconveniences that was rendered to you in line with the release of your due Payment which was delayed because you were in contact with the wrong officials.

As the Chairman of this Anti-fraud Unit, I will like to introduce myself; I am (Mr. Godfrey Jones) a nigerian born british citizen appointed by The Federal Government of Nigeria and The United Nations Organisation (U.N.O) inother to avert corruption, fraud, funds delay and impersonation. To this bestowed Authority I took an oath of allegiance to settle all fraud victims peacefully.

This particular Commission was initiated to detect corruption/fraud/funds delay/impersonation of Government Officials. Secondly, we are surbordinately mandated by The United Nations Organisation (U.N.O) and the US Government to Settle foreign debts/fraud victims/Un-paid beneficiaries and contractors to satisfactory in other to maintain peace in the world at large and also to rekindle our country’s reputation as the giant of Africa.

Presently, we are being paid by the American government inother to avert internet fraud, corruption, funds delays and impersonation here in Nigeria. So far, we have settled the likes of (Mrs. Florence Reeves, Mr. Joseph Bedford etc).

You are being contacted by this office today dated (10th/March/2010) because your Case File (A) is the very first File on our Settlement Files Cabinet and we are ready to Pay you at this moment. From our Intelligent investigations made secretly, we discovered that you are a victim of fraud/funds delay.

This Memorandum is to notify you that you will be settled by the Nigerian Government/ICPC-Nigeria from
our initial Deposit Account with First Bank Of Nigeria Plc. You will be settled with the actual amount which you lost in your previous transaction, including the actual Funds which you are supposed to receive as a beneficiary.

Your settlement will be actualized within 3 working days after your response to this Official Letter.

For further clearification/investigation kindly send the below informations to us immediately:

1. Your Full Name and residential address.
2. Mobile or Telephone Number and Fax Number (for regular official contact).
3. Your inheritance funds value or contract funds value.
4. Amount which you lost previously.

These above-mentioned information will officially enable us to carry out our verification processes and after that your settlement Funds will be Paid to you accordingly.

Your immediate compliance to this will expedite actions on your Payment because here in this office, we have alot of listed victims to be settled.

If you are ready to receive your Funds Settlement then contact us via this email:
(approvedufraudunit@yahoo.cn)

Officially Closed by,

Mr. Godfrey Jones.
Chairman ICPC Nigeria.

Cc:
The Accountant General of the Federation.
The Federal Ministry of Finance (F.M.F).
The Presidency.
First Bank of Nigeria Plc.

CERTIFIED TRUE COPY.



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